When I graduated from college I lived in a five-bedroom house with my friends. We shared all expenses, except long distance telephone calls. We cut down expenses by cooking and eating lunch and dinner together.
All in, even with meals, my monthly cost was $35.00. I paid more because I had my own room.
I didn’t have student loans. The cost of a credit was $13.75. No vehicle. No cell phone. Cigarettes were 45 cents. Beer was between 25 cents and 75 cents. When I was in grad school I bought a used VW Bug for $400.00. It was two years old.
I found jobs very easily. I never, ever worried about money. I never needed to move back home.
When I graduated my parents retired and moved to Florida.
Young people graduating today are facing a whole new reality. So are their parents.
When talking about the relationship between parents and adult children moving back home it can best be described as, “It’s complicated”. It can be so complicated.
Right out of the gate, the generational boundaries have totally shifted.
The young adults have been in charge of their own schedules and lives while living on their own. Moving back home means they have to follow house rules…or do they? Do they pay rent? What about cleaning? Shopping?
Whatever the arrangement, it will be an arrangement that should have no similarity to the rules of childhood.
There are many variables that impinge on the now frequent arrangement of kids coming back home.
I think there are also many variables that prevent kids from moving out again. It can be purely financial. It also can start out as financial, but become something else. Usually any obstacles not financial that arise are unnamed, and unknown on a conscious level.
And none of us can cut the hair on the back of our head. We can’t see what is too close to us. This is one of those situations that can require an objective set of eyes.
It’s too complicated to cover in a short blog, so I will be writing a series on this topic. Stay tuned.